I will have a visit by telephone with Sir Dude, my therapist at 0845 come morning. I am quite eager and would really prefer a face to face, but this will get the Sir and I back into a loop of visitation, our Sit Downs, and our Face to Faces at one of my Safe Places here on Earth Mother. His place is very safe. Speaking of Safe Place, I'll be in one of my Safe Places here at the Lodge. meeting with Sir Dude at the other. So too cool.
Today has been a different day for me. Am looking at the separation between a doctor and his patient in a different perspective. I think this is the happiest I've been about the separation actually. Good move, yes. It was a stressful situation with him anyways. Am thinking about further action, am not sure. And no, I don't give a damn about the initials following his name. This was just something that could have been handled so differently. Enough! let him go...
If I were to say that I am not concerned of the relationship between Sir Dude and I - I would be lieing. Bloody hell, I was referred to Sir Dude by Dr. Psych. I want to feel at total ease with this transition. That Sir Dude will break communications with the former and most importantly, wish to know that my Sir Dude, is not going to abandon me.
It really is amazing how this ordeal has stirred up so much and so many abandonment issues. Almost as if a dam burst and am being flooded with memories! I don't want to think about this anymore. I don't want to feel this negative energy anymore and I really do need to wash my right hand because it smells like someone I used to know. Smell memories suck just as bad as this other shit.
Gotta go.
Ciao!
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