I've Seen This Face Before

Relations,

Welcome and please do pardon my peculiar hour of tip-tapping. I am unable to rest because of the sounds and noises I have cranking it up, up in here! My God, the most obnoxious beep's, yes loud and long beeeeep's! These are followed sometimes by a series of beepity-beep-beeps. This noise is going on within my right ear...

...at this very precise damned moment, I listen in my Deaf left ear to the sound of a roaming satellite circling the globe. I hear it as it approaches, this sound becomes louder - as if the satellite approaches near by and then the easing on of the satellite as it clears and circles Earth Mother. Over and over, and time after time again, the sound of this satellite comes and goes, X2 days now. I failed to mention this one particular revisit of sound to doctor. Should it continue, I'll e-note him about it. It is in fact intriguing, but I am so over it.

I had productive nausea late last night. (The night of 23 August) It was near projectile vomit, but not quite with the full force of The A Type projectile vomit. This nausea attack was a strong one and I was fortunate enough to make it to the commode. What a freaking mess that would have been! Read me on this please. I spoke earlier of Anorexia and Bulimia. These are truths of having survived through the years of both disorders...

...it is a battle after battle situation in one's Path. An all out War, the more I remember. I remember those and remember the days, months and years too damned well. Yes, I remember.

I know in my gut that what is happening with My Path and along My Path for many years is the association of vomiting with Eating Disorders. It's as if my brain's puzzle was created like this. Perhaps to a few Kindred this sounds absurd. To my ears and mind and am sure same goes for many "Other One's" out there - that what I am dealing with would make sense. Seen.

As I have lost this weight my body has changed very much. Earlier today, I enjoyed wearing a pair of old faded Wrangler jeans with a white T-shirt and white long sleeve shirt tucked in and sporting an awesome black belt with a fantastic Levi's buckle. (Yeah, I know) My lid was a Stetson Cowboy hat and I had my usual red bandanna-about-my-neck, the brilliant Power Point Crystal, Navajo Ghost beads and a strand of stones and crystals. I believed strongly that I looked sharp and received many comments and compliments on the weight loss. One of my Friend Gurl's today, informed me that I may have lost chunks from both halves of my ass. Well, I reckon I'll place focus on improving cushion down back there. You see my friend, I am perplexed by the crossing of My Path with certain memories "all" over again. On top of and while facing the Meniere's steadfastly and on purpose. I mean, what kind of shit is this? A complete circle in my life and on My Path? I really, really don't know. All I do know is that every damned time I vomit due to the symptoms of Meniere's Disease - the thoughts and memories are here with me of those eating disorders - with my face over the commode.

I've seen this face before.

Please, don't judge.