Hello, and welcome. I wish to connect this evening with my Guests and Readers, about the appointment and experience I had this afternoon with my Neurologist Professor, my Neurologist Fellow, and the entire Team at the Neurological Pain and Burns Rehab Center at Tampa General Hospital, University Of South Florida. The hospital is a teaching hospital and that's the connection between them both. I would sum this up by saying that I have the privilege to say that I have some of the Nations best doctors, surgeons, nurses and a professor, looking after me and teams of so many Folk who really give a damn about me and the health. Awesome Team TGH/USF and all are a part of my team. Mario's Team, for "The Better State of Health, Mind, Body, and Spiritual Healing. Kindred, all of this is as of today, I commit to an ever changing and continuation of my battles with decades of health, emotional and other forms of recovery.
Today, I listened to my Professor, She-With-Many-Names and have seriously contemplated each word she spoke aloud. Botswana, my bride of 33 years was sitting next to me and we both listened and talked with my Professor and her Fellow. Who actually, was a young and very wise Woman Fellow. In my head that would be the same as if I called my sister "dude". Seen. I love Women. I love my Woman, and I love Women doctors. For most stuff, en`it?, a Woman doctor is cool, but not everything can might be associated with a kind Woman Lady Doctor and I, you see? I don't know, so please, don't ask. Okay? We all had good talk and share, She, speak up some about diagnosis's and what is in store for me as a patient over the next few weeks and months. In no particular time span, order, or schedule, there are many MRI's of the brain, cervical and lower lumbar spines, and spinal cord, a spinal tap, tests to look at slippage of spine and the potential of more lesions on my spinal cord. Surgery is in my future sooner than later, I speculate. A two week program post or pre-surgery, where I will be in the tutelage of a Pain Psychologist. Yes. That's what I said. Another Psychologist - this one for pain. I have long ago forgotten how many of these professionals I have crossed paths with. Whew. Stop this drama dammit! There will be therapies for this and therapies for that and so much other shit that I am fighting emotions as I tip tap right here in my safe place. I shared my confusion with my Professor and my Fellow-Young-Woman, I don't know.
I do know I am positive that I am relieved the extensions of procedures due to insurance matter comes to an end soon. Sir., what am I to think or say when I am asked about a mass on my spinal cord? I mean, no insurance put a cease fire on all of my procedures, scans and all of that dung. My medications. My medicine. The pills that years ago "I" would have fought against, but shit Honey, I'm talking about what lives in this skin and attached to this skeleton. Shit!
And, Oh My God, too!!.
Unfortunately, I am once again at a ceiling when it comes to Pain Management, there is simply not much more we are able to do. I could not receive injections today due to insurance issues and costs. The past two nights have been the nearest I have gotten to an emergency department in a mighty long time. It is a pleasure to say I have not rushed off and I'm proud of this. But, Olivia, to be awoken by such horrific pain that all I was able to do is moan. No talking. I excused myself from my safe place so I don't trouble my dear spouse Botswana, remove myself so my moan and growls will not wake her. And or, our Dogg Pound. God Bless.
Today, I failed, I damned forgot to bring back up medications while out and about earlier. Shit, that's a lesson I won't soon forget. Good, goodness, how miserable an experience it was. Then not be able to receive injections for this excruciating-mind bending pain! She-With-Many-Names, has ordered an increase in a Pain Medication that we have experimented with for approximately two months. Thank God, this is prescribed to me to assist in the twenty-four hour a day pain. This walking and living torture. I have walked these shoes. I have walked my moccasin's and am in the position where I find myself having to place major trust on fellow Human Earth Mates...
...I am in the position to consider where is it that I am in Life today. Where am I this cool October night, meaning where is it that I find myself? There's work to get done, I figure there are a few things I'll have to prioritize, then, my friend, make it happen. I want to keep my moccasin's on my feet and my Ghost Beads around my neck. I am home again, I feel this in my heart.
Great One, is this my Cross to bare? Is this pain that flows through my veins, is this Meniere's Disease, to be the last straw. Is going Deaf going to hurt me so bad that I am at an impasse?
Kindred, I am a simple, sometimes goofy-sometimes too serious-type-of-dude. I am a mixed blood and I am a man who is Deaf in the left ear, and hard of hearing in my right ear. I wear a hearing aid in my right and a Baha on the left. Baha, is the Bone Anchored Hearing Aid. I return for Neurological Pain BOTOX procedures next month. Between then and now, a Medical/Business Plan will be drawn up by the one tip tapping here.
Good Morning, Good Night, and Good Afternoon. Love, peace, and more peace. Seen?
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