This Weight Thing

Dearest Kindred,

I am ashamed, embarrassed and sad to report that I have permitted a bit of weight to creep back into my life and on my butt. I see a bit gathering around the waist but my pant size hasn't. For now, any ways. And yes, I do enjoy having a rear bumper and all that junk in the trunk stuff and I sure do like the way it feels when I disrobe. You know, that feeling of something over back there that is like a nice smooth speed bump...

...I just can't see this fat back in my life though and I don't want to have this mess of added stress on my chest! No! Think healthier - be healthier.

There has been some inactivity in my life over the past month or so. Too much sleep! Too much of not doing enough. No, there was not total inactivity, yet enough for this issue to resurface.

When I begin to have the issue of weight in mind, too many memories of Anorexia and Bulimia are stirred up. Too many - too damned many. Which brings me to this, and I must be gut honest about this particular something that troubles me in my heart. You see Kindred, I have placed too much emphasis on pleasing others with the loss of my weight. PERIOD! When I did not get feed back from others, especially them close to me, I felt a failure and an immense disappointment. Seen. Sometimes I felt as if I had to walk on egg shells with them who are large in my circle. I do realize and understand activity in my day-to-day is essential in fulfilling my plans of being a healthier and slimmer individual.

What I think I need to do is take some of my power back and focus solely on the benefits I will receive from weight loss and really not give a damn about what others may say and or think. This is my life and My Path! I am a Survivor in spite of many and a few Kinfolk and their friends. Yes. I take back my energy and I will focus more on taking back my power. Some Folk, simply need to be informed I guess. So I will, and the focus is on my health - it is the only person's health that I can have anything to do with. Not theirs and their gluttonous ways.

I have made this return to a loss of weight as a gift to myself. Not others. I will make the return to activity as it was just a few weeks ago. Walk more. Lift more. Eat better. Cut the sugar more!
I may have been hampered with Meniere's Disease and it's symptoms, but I bet I can do much better with such of things like keeping both eyes open and gain a solid conscientiousness of the vittals intake. True?

Don't you all know that I am to prepare this Human shell for 2013? It's going to be great year!