Relations,
The last communique was heavy and I listened to the words as I re-read what it was I attempted to share back several days ago. I noticed a few errors. I hope all will understand as there were topics that really hit nerves in my heart and in my two brains. Folks, these days enjoy calling this sensation alive within me a passion. I enjoy calling it me, as I really am who I am. If I were to attempt change or alter my course, in negative ways, many would make me aware. I have no doubt of that. It surprises me at how some Folk respond to the news of my pursuing plans at the Department of Education's, Vocational Rehab. In my skin, it makes sense that I make adjustment and pick up where I am at now and begin the process of getting back into the work force. It's in my nature to work.
I would love to thank two dear friends and their son for busting me out of the house today. What an awesome way to help a little rain storm go on by, but with the company of them who are alive within my heart and mind. Brian, you and Kathy and the awesome Lil' Nizzle are same as Earth Angels to me. I love you all to deaf and thank you for sharing your company and time with me. How cool!
I do not remember saying this, but your visit was like medicine to my Spirit's...
...I awoke earlier in the morning to spend a spell with Bwana before she was off to work. Once she was off and on her way, our house of seven windows grew too quiet. Too silent. This Meniere's woke up with me and the symptoms of sounds and noises, a slight tipsy dizziness and mild nausea. I share the noises then are as they are now, loud and amplified. As in sounds manifest time and time over. My right ear listening to the sounds of Tarzan's neighbourhood and my left with the sounds of many beeps. Some long and loud, other's like now are beeping quietly off in the distance. The left side of my face has had multiple spasms and I have been visited by the spiders and worms off and on today.
After my dear wife left for work, I returned to sleep and slept for a couple of hours. The silence after having the sounds of laughter and much conversations was deafening. Yes. I know.
The sadness remains present and affecting. Yesterday was Christmas Day, yet it feels so far away from where I sit today. No, I do not wish to try to explain right now, I reckon it would be one of those ranting and raving sort of things, so I'll pass. I just know that I am blue.
Depression lurks behind the symptoms of the Meniere's. I know this very well. This time of year it is also all wrapped up all pretty like for the holidays too. I thought you knew.
No comments:
Post a Comment