House of Seven Windows

The "House of Seven Window's", is the name of my dwelling. My humble homey yet eccentric home.

My Bride and I are simple Folks. We have nothing to prove. We are Blessed with some pretty awesome neighbours. Most of which are considered friends. We have established our own little crime watch and have exchanged telephone numbers. We are the sixth home situated at the end of a cul-de-sac. This one block which consists of twelve homes and is multi-generational as well as a multi-ethnic community. A fine blend of good Folks.

Crystals are placed at each window. Some window ledges may have special stones or gems along with the crystal. See'er stones are randomly placed, as are clusters of amethyst.

On occasion, we have ceremony by burning white sage, pine, and other types of herbs. Today, I had ceremony of beating the drum. This in honor of someone I know who is having back surgery today. The anticipation I have in my heart is same as if this young man were Kinfolk. God, please Bless the hands of the doctors who will be cutting open this way cool fellow.

Alot of music is played in our home. A wide variety of sounds from so many different genre's. I have loved music since I was a child...many times in my youth, music was an escape from what I was living. When my grade five teacher introduced me to Beethoven, my life was changed forever and to this very day. Yes, I am a Ludwig Van Beethoven dweeb. I still cry when I listen to his Symphony #9, in D Minor, Op. 125. I've always felt as if he wrote his music with a certain people in mind. I am glad to be one of those certain people.

We have piece's of Native American, Indian art work. Most signed by the artist. My favorite artist is Donald Vann. His pieces portray Cherokee way of life back when life was Cherokee. Not assimilation. My art pieces of Dream Boxes and Dream Catchers are set randomly.

Our House of Seven Windows, is my Safe Place and is a sanctuary to all. Kinfolk, kindred, and the feathered and fury cousins who visit. No harm. This is a place of peace, for peace.

We have a large library of books. The majority are Indian and have become a part of our home. Most have been read and then some of these have been read more than once. These very books have often been companions for me over the past three or more years. How does one fall in love with a book? I don't know? Yet, I do and have...I reckon.

I leave this note now having said enough. There is nothing more for me to say but...

...peace, love and beauty be with all my Relations...

K-Lo, Physical Therapy & The State of the Body Address

The Best Physical Tharapist I have ever had - Mr. K-Lo, payed me a visit this afternoon and we had an excellent session. Exersise's that I practice every day, a bit of walk about and the ole reach and grab from above...he was observing to see if I remembered what he taught me with respect to always having a hand on the counter. Ensuring I am being safe and sure. The teacher was pleased...and I am guarding myself from a mishap, you see? This is a win-win situation for me. When I said the best earlier I meant it with God's truth. I can not lie when I place these words as the Great Spirit's Truth.

Mr. K-Lo, has been an awesome coach and teacher. His instructions are clear and his empathy, although unspoken is felt with-in my Spirit's. My eye's, mind and heart believe this young man wants me to PUSH this shit! So I do. With mucho gusto!

I'll share again, this human body is a loaner. I've got to keep it as healthy and as strong as I can and will continue to work it to improve the scenario. My body is my business. No investment - no profit. Oh my, my whole ass is a loaner!

My Spirit's and Soul know who my God is! We know which way is best to go...

Stop! For you few haters, please lean back and take care of your attitudes and prejudices, and your stank ass bigotry and your own shit. Oh, baby please, don't even let me get started with your dumb-ass ignorant ways. Do me a favor, and I hope you don't mind, but let me clear my throat. Sometimes I wonder why I even permit your toxic parasitic person to influence or stereotype me. Right. As Cee Lo Green, would say, "Forget You"....Fuck!

I am dizzy with difficulty keeping a focus on these keys. Nausea is high and I am perspiring. A constant spin...Blah, blah, blah...

...my dearest Deaf-Left-Ear is hearing a clickity-click. My Right-Good-Bad-Ear, is listening to giant cicadas. No crickets, cicadas going solo. I have ear gas today with both plooping.

My neck has pain and that peculiar numb spot where my neck and skull meat. After all, I am a walking piece of meat. True? True.

Have lost more weight. My waist size continues to drop and beats the loss of my poundage. It is not polite to ask someone how much they weigh, so I won't share. I bet if I wanted a sports bra I would find one my size..alright and okay then.

My brains and achy body are telling me to go to sleep! I really don't want to - so, I think I'll do a wee bit of walking about. I'll be safe out there. I promise.

To all Relations, peace.

Meniere's Manifest Melagne

Have had too many moments lately when I am fully aware that sarcasms, negative energy, and poor vibes are directed at me. Usually over the most minute of matter. Well, I think rather usually revolves around my hearing or lack there of. My Heart is heavy. Unnecessarily so. I mean? It is my responsibilty to maintain a positive energy and vibe about myself, me, and I. My Dear God, it is all so really needed. There are times I feel as if I'm being punished for some long ago sin.

I have bathed under the running stream of God's Water this afternoon. Thus, was baptized. Again. I felt this ceremony necessary to prepare for the words I will place here today...be it like this or something like that. I won't know until my mind gets there. Have a conversation with you about how Meniere's dictates my every consideration. Today's...

I see and hear or don't hear my life changing before my eye orbs. Really? Please take just a minute to read how this Meniere's has affected me today and up to this moment...

Nausea has been high and was productive earlier. I vomitted nothing but water, undigested medications and bile. I have sweated - not perspired off and on all day...at this moment my grey t-shirt has dark spots from the moisture. Meds? Please. There is a knot in my throat as if I went through the "China Buffet" for a third serving. That's Bulimia shit there for real.

My Right-Good-Bad-Ear went totally silent on me roughly twenty minutes ago. I listened with baited breath...not rushing it, not trying to change it's course. This silence lasted for seconds. Which seemed like minutes. I just listened to it. My hearing is of a poor quality today...very poor. While listening to MTV/U, it was necessary for me to turn the volume to max to have a satisfactory listen. (I just vomitted in my mouth) I have had the Sounds of South African jungle play and rewind itself over and over and over again...it's playing now. Shittin' Really?!

My Left-Deaf-Hearing-Anomaly-Ear, has had something like dull chirps. Like a bird chirp, just not the chirps of a happy bird, for example. Lasted for several seconds and am presently listening to the beep-beep-beep's of a Morris Code. This sound has been constant for I do not know how long. I am here in and am listening to this NOW. In concert with Mogwai's, "Cody".

Today, I have not slept and will not sleep until later on this evening. Way to much sleep has gone on since Physical Therapy last Friday. Oh yes, I really thought K-Lo and I were to have a session today. He never called. So tomorrow I'll call K-Lo. We only have two visits remaining and I really do want to bust them wide open.

My balance and coordination has been more off than usual. Has forced me to slow things down a bit. Have had a couple/three bumps and trips.

The cervical spine has a numb spot on the upper left side of my skull. Pain remains with the exception of this mystery numb spot. I have done my exercises plus have continued to lift the kettle weight. Till it burns...

My heart is heavy. And I am blue. Yes, I took my neat little razor tipped pills...I have to. And I have to be honest and say I am thankful for them although I am loathing this reality.

My Path...my dear Path...

The Past Twenty Four Hours

Yesterday, the 24th of June 2011, K-Lo and I had one heck of an interesting session. He shared exercise's for strengthening of these neck muscles of mine. We have done and will continue to do exercises to keep my body stronger than it has been, which is to assist me with the battle of the balance. I sure do hope to evict this damned pain real good and prompt like. A numb spot has developed left of where my head and neck meet. No, I did not call my doctor yesterday. She Who Intimidates Me, intimidates me.

Alrighty then, let me get back to K-Lo, we stirred my equilibrium also known as the "Pot" really good and plenty yesterday, so much so, I was forced to retire for a spell shortly after he left. Slept well into the early evening, woke up for two or three hours and then was back to sleep. It's really weird livivg like this...doing therapy for something good, yet am placed in a spot where I must go against the grain on something else. In this case the meniere's disease. Brenda worries, while my therpist K-Lo and I bust a move on this neck thing...speaking of which, there is pain as I communicate these words and frustration as well because, She Who Intimidates Me, has put me through P.T. three times with this round included. Looks like I'll be blue and grey and have these fucking worms eating my brain and body before I feel any right good results...

...I wonder how much money, She Who Intimidates Me, has run up on the insurance company and I. I am confidant in saying ten's of thousands of dollars! All of which I consider an utter waste of time and money, because here I sit years later and we're still dealing with this same old dung. Many times I have considered going else where and why I have not is something I simply can not explain. I am a loyal person, I know, but maybe this relationship between patient - doctor has run it's course...has gone too far. I don't know. I really just don't know.

Shit!

Meniere's is messing with my emotions today...something really bad. Dizzy at a level of six, nausea at a level of eight and I want to hurl chunks something awful. I sit here perspiring. My Left-Deaf-Ear is Deaf at this moment and my Right-Good-Bad-Ear and I are listening to the enchanted sounds of Tarzan's jungle, which is backing up Ray Parker Jr. and Raydio's "Get Down". My dear worms are busy this afternoon...making babies or constructing a new dwelling. I don't know. Both ears are plopping and I really do want to go to bed. I think I'll make a go of it today though, and just wait for an early time to retire to bed.

I am continuing to lose both inches and weight. Mostly inches, which is like so bonus! Soon I'll be wearing a size smaller than where I am now. No, I will not share. It has gotten to the point where I must wear a belt with all of my slacks, capri's and shorts. The weeble-wooble of my head has no plans on leaving anytime soon, I tell you. If anything it may get worse...seems as if the more I lose and the better I'm looking in the mirror the more wooble headed I become. Think I'll be going up a size in my nipple ring and am thinking same for my ear. I continue to lift the kettle weight bar and am noticing a nice change in my arms...starting to see the sky blue colours of my veins. Oh, I love it!

To all Relations, walk in beauty.

Farewell to Kind Spirits, Visited Dr, Psych, & Meniere's

Today was the final day for Kind Spirit's and I as team mates. Our three visits permitted have been exhausted and it was time to say farewell. I have always disliked farewells and have hated good-byes since childhood. For me goodbyes are often heart wrenching and too sad for me. And yes, I have cried at many a good-bye. Especially when I know the chances of crossing paths again are slim or even worse, knowing I might not ever see an individual again is too sad.

Todays farewell with Kind Spirits was just that, a farewell. Not the good-bye. Yes, I was disappointed when it was made certain there were only three visits and yes, there was a bit of sadness in my Spirit's. There were kinfolk here (My BIL and my two nephews) and I reckon I felt best not to cry at that moment. It is so wonderful how God has our Paths cross with others every once and again in life. Thank you Great Spirit for having Kind Spirit's and my Path cross again. And thanks to you Kind Spirit for your teaching and motivating words.

This afternoon I was able to keep my appointment with Dr. Psych and we had a rather pleasent visit, yet I left there lacking something. Have not been able to put a finger on it...can't even smell neither...Yet.

Note: A Time Out For Say and Share: Under my belly button I have what is like one of these ")" lieing down on it's side. Like a real smile! It is the location where He Who Touched My Brain, removed excess body stuff's to plug up my skull when he did the Vestibular Nerve Section. That's when I lost hearing and balance on the left side. I had given my Good Doctor the go ahead to do liposuction while he was up in there...I had had rhinoplasty in the past you see, but I guess he wasn't seeing it, because he took out just enough to patch me up and seal it with a kiss and a titanium plate on the skull. Alright, this is what I want to do - I want two tats there that are just the most stunning eyes one has ever seen. No, really, I mean it. Besides, how much would something like that go for? Short dollars? See, I would have the eye's inked, my belly button as the nose and then the scar for the permanent smile. Check Back...

...just one of those funking things about me...good funky Folks. Please? Funky stuff like the fantastic music from the 1970's Funky Funk, Funk...

My left deaf ear has been with the loud bleeding beeps all afternoon and into tonight. My right good-bad-ear is so very loud with my friends of the Amazon Rain Forest it is keeping me awake. I am dizzy and am nauseated to a point of disgust and yearn to vomit. I am perspiring around my head and neck as if I was wearing a misting ball cap. Have been very clumsy when walking about. Today, both ears were plopping. Don't ask...I don't know...

...I would pray for some new fancy pill that would "help" matters - but then, would'nt that be just another shittin' pill to have to eat?

For the time being I'll continue to do my P.T. exercises and continue to lift my little ten pound kettle bar. I am beginning to feel as if I have a stronger frame on these bones.

...so that when I fall in the future I'll smash some shit up, en'it?

p.s. The pain in my neck is getting pretty bad. Time to call in the morrow.

Farewell Kind Spirit's!!!

The Whole Package!

Shortly after posting yesterdays publication it was necessary for me to lay down for what was supposed to be a few minutes "just to help the dizzy go away". I ended up sleeping until 1900 then was back to sleep at 2200.

I am certain this was a result of last P.T. session. My doctor has stated same. But, you see, I have only three visits remaining and I am not willing to sacrifice a damned good theraputic session because it may stir up the pot a couple/few days. K-Lo, the Uber Therapist, has me under his tutelage and I refuse to be some bleeding twit moaning and groaning about side affects. He knows I want the whole package and he damned sure is doing his best to teach me. He reminds me from time to time to breath. Sounds like the advice I have passed on to the family, friends and fellow Survivors. Just one of those things we don't always do with concentration. We breath, yes, but out of necessity. Breathing is something many of us take for granted. It's true. When was the last time you took in a big cleansing breathe through the nose and exhaled slowly through the mouth?
It's fantasticly soothing really. Let me share something that I think is cute. There has been a few times when K-Lo has mistaken the colour of my skin for not breathing...especially this time of year my skin is a deep natural red/light brown. We've laughed everytime he has made this call. Bless his heart.

As an Asthmatic, I am too damned familiar with not being able to breath easy. There have been times when and where I have myself in hospital or emergency department being saved by their staff. With all my heart, I know very well, the last time I was in an emergency state, the hospital's staff saved my life. With none a doubt.

I will be seeing Kind Spirit's in an hour or so for some Occupational Therapy. He who has crossed my path before, contains a wealth of knowledge and really cares for me as a fellow human. Brenda and I have discussed some of his recommendations for the Bath and have concluded that we will take baby steps until all is complete. Am certain this will please the Kind Spirited one.

Meniere's is kicking it up a spell as I am plenty nauseated and sitting here in a cool room and just to perspire. The dizziness is rolling on medium and no, I have not yet taken my medications. Will directly. My left Deaf ear is listening to a locomotive passing me by in my back yard. Odd? My right ear has gone deaf on me twice this morning and continues to be on a low scale for hearing at all. On that note, there are days when I hear very well with this ear, then there are days like yesterday when I have tunnel hearing. Sort of like listening through a tube or straw...

...not that I've ever tried listening through a tube or straw. Just saying.

Hello? Is Anybody There?

I just recently answered the house telephone with my left ear. It was my Honorable Daughter Number One calling...

...I do not answer the telephone with the greetings of hello. For decades I have greeted all of my callers with the greeting, "peace". A simple greeting from the simple man. When I greet with peace, I extend by one simple word to the ear and mind of the one on the other side of the line a wish for peace for them and their Relations. I may not always be in a peaceful spot, but this is my ultimate wish for We here on Earth Mom. So I do my hardest to be a peaceful one...

...I am also eager to have company during my day as it is lonely being alone. I appreciate when folks call to check on me and folks, I will speak with a solicitor for five minutes, politly listening to their scripted presentation, then I will kindly excuse myself and disconnect. Oh yeah, I do. And have that person on the roll with their presentation too!:) Please.

Anyways, the point is - is that when my daughter called, I responded with my usual greeting, then said hello and asked who is this? And yes, I was getting quite irritated...

...then finally realized I answered the telephone without speaker engaged and with some degree of embarrassment...

...I realized I answered the telephone with my Deaf Left ear.