After having slept very much of Thursday and Friday, I awoke this morning earlier than usual, and felt that I was going to ride the mess out of my pony, John Wayne. When we're hot we're hot!
Today would have been a good to to die. A very warm Florida day and night. I also know and believe today has been a good day to be alive...
...Meniere's accompanied me on my ride-along with Brenda and one of my sisters doing week end run about's. I'm thinking that maybe a couple of items sunk deep into the crevices of one of my brains today. Maybe I speak of them now or may be later. Depends on where my Spirit's and these fingers and thumbs take me once the energy get's to moving.
Tomorrow will be 14 day's since my last Meniere's vertiogo attack. Please understand a major part of the meniere's is the "coming back home process". For shit sakes, I just slept a twenty four to 30 hour span where my body shut down. No in-take, no out-put. It is quite honestly as if my enite body closes shop. What troubles me most about this recent sleep spell is how late it was in the post-vertigo attack. Brenda and I agree this has been the longest stretch coming out of such...
...then Brenda, asked "do you think Nicole's leaving for Abu Daubi, added to an already depressed state of being"? As much as my mind wanted me to man up and say no - the Daddy heart kicked in. It knocked me in the head.
My Honorable #1, left for Abu Daubi, a few days before I last had an attack. I wanted to scream at her as she walked towards the People Mover at TIA - Nikki, PLEASE DON'T GO! Don't go Kiki! My heart was bad. But felt obligated to be "the strong one". Little did my Kinfolk know I was falling apart inside...cryed in private and for day's and night's...
...like, I mean, she's my First Born child. She's was Daddy's first pretty, pretty princess. In a few days my baby will be turing 30 years of age. Yes, maybe in my brain - but not my heart. And like Bobby Brown sang, "It's My Perogative". I'm the Dad and if this has been a difficult transition, so be it. God know's...
...We're both Libra's so somethimes we know just what to say...maybe rarely, the wrong words to utter. Alas, what can one do when they live in a shoe?
Have decided to close this entry with those and these words...
...daughter I love you more than life itself. I would gladly take a bullet for you. Give you a kidney. Give you the one good eye orb I have. You know that I know you know, this is your home too. You are always welcome home baby. For forever and always.
I miss you so much and yes, I still cry myself to sleep...
...I love you Sweet Nikki...with all my heart...
No comments:
Post a Comment