Kinfolk, Kindred and Relations,
The rains have moved in from the Gulf of Mexico and pass over head. Actual blue clouds are puffed up and look like a giant ball of berry cotton candy. A fat boy's dream and first...
...I have slept many hours and am doing my best to avoid the bed and my safe place. My Secret Place.
I have been sweating a mess. I wonder if this may be a contributing factor in my loss of weight. Oh, no, don't get me wrong, I am very pleased with the loss of poundage. I will continue to focus on the benefits of it. The sweating piece is a Meniere's symptom. Side affect? Consequence of? Changes. As I feel a trail of perspiration slide down the back of my neck. Wouldn't be right to have such a huge bobble head on this thinning neck. Please. Bling please.
There is a nausea that promotes discomfort. No gagging - just under the radar nausea. It's right at the bottom of my neck bother-some. I fight to keep it at bay. And feel my heart flutter.
Dizzy, as in, after a fantastic and awesome laughing-my-ass-off, dizzy. It's just that this dizzy has been around and about me all this morning. Too much. This dizziness is not a life style one wants to find themselves in. The shit happens and then more shit happens. Once that the shit happens, it promotes more shit to happen. The dizziness is a piece of me and this skin I'm in.
My right ear has been popping the past twenty four hours. Plopping too. Sometimes quite loud. Nuisance shit! Sometimes this noise startles me and I respond in what I would consider to be an ordinary way. Okay, there have been times when the damned "pop" was so loud, I have responded with a "note of displeasure"...
...I mean, what the fuck? I have been reprimanded for this by so many I love. Kinfolk and Kindred. Never a stranger, always Kin. It is also Kin, who raise their voice in public to let me know I am speaking too loud...
...Honey's, I am Deaf and have issues listening with my Good-Bad Right Ear. I am trying to adjust and humble myself in asking you to do the same. Help me. Do not belittle me or pass judgement on me. There are other ways to get my attention. A simple wave as I have shown you is all it takes. I promise. Just please, don't reprimand me in public for Pete's sake.
To them with two faces and many masks, don't bother. Your words mean as much to me as the smell of these hound's farts.
Yes, perhaps there is some ornery business going on in both brains. What to do?
My Left deaf Ear is listening to the turn signal of-the-car-in-my-head. Click-click-click-click - and on and so on and loud enough that I could count the click-click-clickity-clicks. Fucking obnoxious shit! Simple as that! If some one was being tortured by this method, it would break the Geneva Convention...
...My God.
I can hear thunder now. It's off in the distance. Like the thunder rolls...
...sounds like drums in a Pow-Wow. Soothes my mind and eases my heart.
I am not sure if I have ever shared this with anyone, but I would like to share that this disease Meniere's changes lives. I know and am able to share that first hand.
Enough for now.
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