Dearest Kinfolk, Kindred and Relations,
I'll begin this communique by sharing that I have had another Meniere's/ vertigo attack. This took place late on Mother's Day evening and or the wee hours of Monday morning. I am really not sure and truly only remember the beginning and waking this morning...
...there was a trigger that started this attack. I have seen this happen before, but don't recall it being a symptom or trigger of Meniere's. I was laying back in bed after reading a bit of Chief Joesph, when I looked up to the ceiling and watched the ceiling and room rotate. As if I was in a twirl about and someone caused it to twist about for just a moment. This was a slow trigger and what I did was simply put the books away and turned off the light. It was not long before I was off to dream land where I remained until a while ago.
My bones, flesh and skull hurt me. My neck and muscles hurt and ache. I feel like I've had a good flogging. In a Northern Town. Somewhere far, far and away...
...is where I wish to be today. Somewhere, where I can run. A place I may learn to run! It's but a dream. I know for now, It's but a dream.
I am presently sweating at an eight's pace and consider a cool shower would help. These do work sometimes, ya know. My crown is moist and around my collar is wet from the perspiration. The water slides down my stomach and back. So very uncomfortable.
I am very off balance and have been uncoordinated since I awoke. Requiring an easy step and being aware of my environment. I've had visions of a fall recently, as in seeing it in the Crystal Ball I have spoken of. Which concerns me because i have learned, 9 out of 10 times it's right on target. whiles the other one keeps me a tested. I would have to give this balance and coordination issue an 8.50.
Nausea is high and am tasting what it was I ate for break fast and lunch. The gagging is disgusting. I burp to assist in the battle with the nausea. This too requires an 8.
The beeps in my right ear continue. The weird noises and sounds do too. I'm thinking these too have made themselves at home in my skull. My Left Deaf Ear, has been the beeping one, so now it has a mate. It roars aloud. So very loud. I Can't explain it. I stopped trying.
The passing of fluids from the site of surgery remains active. Too many Monday's to count right now. The pain from site fluctuates as well. In three weeks there shall be a new wound. With new wound issues.
So, there's this nesting thing that's stirring up with-in me. I want to have a few things on my to do list removed prior to the day of operation. I've noticed that I tend to heal and rehab better when I know that certain things are completed. Most occasions that is.
Don't ask - I'm weird like that.
I have continued to lose weight and am glad to report this. I have presently 35 pounds and am so very happy to have done so. Down from 294 to 259. One can just look at that number 35 and know that there's some changing going on in this Man's life. My Path. That equals out to: One twenty pound sack of brown rice, one five pound bag of sugar and one ten pound bag of flour. That's some extra weight right there, en'it? There have been flash backs to when I had Anorexia. This is scary for me while going through the process of losing weight. For sure something I will discuss with my therapist, Sir Dude, next week. I do not want to sabotage what it is I am doing to improve my State of Better Health. Thirty five pounds is only thirty five pounds, but in my head, thirty five pounds is a whole damned lot of thirty five pounds. Can you dig?
I've no more to say. Except for this, love, peace and more peace, it's me.
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