When asking others to be genuine, it is necessary that I be that, plus more!It's a joy when I throw in the extra touch of sincerity. I suspect this is being genuine at it's most faithful. Faithful. Be it deed or in word, being genuine transcends life and time. Truth does not become altered over a course of years or decades even. It is the gladness in my Spirit that permits me to speak the truth...
...sadly, there are too many Relations in my Circle who are compelled to put on fake faces with I and I and you too. Too many "I love you's" spoken by them with open mouth like a dog waiting for his/her dog treat. Too many "kinfolk" and too many "friends" who speak through plastic lip smiles and no eye's.
Truth, is my acceptance in the process I began tonight. There is just way enough 'Drama-Up-In-Here' and in my Life's Path. It is amazing how even at this age and time in life, I am still the student...learning. Kinfolk Drama is one thing. Them in my Circle who were once Relations/Friends are an all together different matter.
It is so really necessary for me to let go. I am really tired of living like this.
Have listened, observed and have learned this...We are all on Our Path's, moving along as one may. I get this. I have recently had to listen to my eldest daughter's hurt due to a conflict in schdule due to a family reunion. MY FAMILY is having this REUNION! And, no, there has been no note or call. No invite. Not to "Mario's and Libby's" children. We have had reuinion in October or November for decades. I say, some shit, en'it?! This mystery Family Reunion happens to fall on the date of a rather important gathering scheduled for Celebration. My bride, just a day or two ago was saddened to recieve an invite in mail to a function scheduled on her birth date. As in The Big 50. No joke. Really.
How do I communicate this has been as it has always been...except for the Elder's. Them who have passed before me made sure when reunion time come - every body comes. It was them who shared love, respect, and honor towards the mixed blooded kids. "Mario's and Libby's children". Bullshit! We were like a pack of coyotes. Most of the kinfolk didn't give two shits then and even less today. Ma, Pa, and seven of us mixed breed children. Oh Lord, how many years this goes back?
Them who were the enabler's...He who taught me tricks as a boy, He-Who-Took-Me-To-Baseball. Those who were near the scenes of crimes but never called the police. Never. They who heard the screams and crys.
Hey! Look. I know that you know, my memorey is sharp and crisp. So, please do believe that even as a child, I felt your slights and your prejudice...my memorey banks are full to the brim. So, no, please don't. Too many years I have been honest and open with my Kinfolk. I don't give a shit if you and I don't see eye-to-eye. Too many years I have listened to lies. They cut to the white meat when it comes from Kinfolk or Relations.
This is a topic I have journaled and blogged about. Have been on a television show and have written articles. Have written to and have spoken with some like-minded folks. I see by the Crow's Feet near my eye's, I have some "Letting Go's" to attend to...
Think I'll read this once over then post it. Shit, I've carried this with me my whole damned life! How in the hell do Kinfolk go prejudice against Kinfolk. Oh, and please don't...
...I remember every one of you who called me nigger. Or Faggot...to name two. I suspect this covers some good bases as there was much name calling and emotional shit neck deep going on ALL the time!
What? Have walked this Path long enough with this much luggage on my shoulders. Time to ease the strain in my Center. My Good God...
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