Kindred One;s,
Something I have not shared in a while and has always been a favorite way of connecting for me has been with talking about what is the latest on my bed-side table.
I'll begin with the literary and share that for the second time I have read a booklet first published in 1978, titled, "Practical Suggestions For Persons With A Hearing Impairment", written by Loren J. Bartels, M.D., while an Assistant Professor of Surgery, an Assistant Professor of Neurology Division of Otolaryngology, at the University of South Florida Medical Center, Audio-Vestibular Center. An interesting, educational and a nostalgic read. I suspect that some of the product and subject matter discussed in this booklet are no longer manufactured or spoken. In spite of an occasional step-out-of-time, this information is just as up in the face current as one might take at first note of going out of sound in this age and time. Very interesting indeed.
A second book recently completed is, "When The Legends Die?, written by Hal Borland. This book is a Five Star Read and what a true gut wrenching, life inspiring story! Mr. Borland, spoke to me through his words and I read this and experienced it as if one and or another read the story to me. With this publication there is no doubt that this was just about as close to one of those "can't put it down" books, I have read in a mighty long spell. What an emotional, Indian Story.
I will soon complete yet another reading of The Constitution of the United States of America, along with the Declaration of Independence, which was written by them who came before my Grand Father's, Grand Father's. Please, don't ask. I am not certain why it is I have this motivation to read and re-read these documents of historical nature....
...I bend my knee in a state of humbleness to say that there is some thing's just not quite white about these utterances, written down a couple of hundred years ago. I mean, really, if it has been a while since you never read The Constitution and Declaration of Independence, maybe it might could be a mighty fine time for some of you bible thumping, Two Faces who scream so loud so much more about "your" Rights. Oh, too busy and not concerned and not thinking about Rights's, is not using our rights's. Folk's not knowing our Rights's confuses my heart beats. It saddens me to see so many Kinfolk and Kindred carry on like a band of roaming apes, to vote on who the alpha is. !*POP*! - it makes me wonder how many of us citizens have never read these documents. I have enjoyed reading the Bible, more than one time even! I mean, like not even one never-ever-never look at the words of this country's history? I make a smile, yet my heart is bad from these ridiculous debating and political propaganda's on even my social fucking escapes. For Fucking Shit Sakes Folk's.!
I continue to read The New International Webster's Standard Dictionary, School and Office Edition. Kinfolk, I get a silly joy out of finding silly little errors with in these dictionaries. This one is my second dictionary. I read my first, two or so years removed. Still have it and still use it too. Yeah, I know. Don't ask why is it that I am utilizing two dictionaries at the same time when one would suffice. Well, this is because I have not read this other dictionary yet. Can you dig?
In Honor of Holocaust Remembrance Day and in Honor of Holocaust Remembrance Week, I have introduced myself to an author named Daniel Jonah Goldhagen. The title of this thick hard cover is "Hitler's Willing Executioners, Ordinary Germans And The Holocaust". I must admit that I am not knowing how to approach this publication as of yet, I am just a few pages in and I can feel the changes in my tummy and the rate of my respiration's have increased and what this author I am hoping will do, with the respect for all and every one involved in this War is to shed a light on the history of the conduct of German citizens, who did turn their backs on their very own neighbour. To murder your neighbour because One is a Jew, or because I am One who wears the Pink Triangle. My Dear God, Six Million Jews. Exterminated. In many cases, their own Kinfolk, would sabotage one and an other's True Blood Family. I have studied WWII history since late elementary school and have never turned back. As a Boy, what ever book I could borrow and or get my hands on from the library in school or the one in West Tampa or the one down town, I would walk the streets of West Tampa Junior High School - (The Home of the Greyhounds!) - to get my next book fix and owned my childhood home down there near Habana - not too far from the bakery there on Cypress.
I have here on my bedside table my journal for writing left handed. One high yellow highlighter marker, a couple of pens - one ball point the other gel. There's a couple or three Post Cards, my native stationary, a glass jar that has been cracked still with many quartz crystals, gems, stones and rocks enclosed. I am afraid the jar would be saddened should I place it into the recycle bin. The Family Martin, gifted me a hand full of some sweet and awesome gems. These lay here on my bedside table next to where it is I rest my big gimp bobble head. Tranquility?
On my bedside table, I have a fantastic "Woody", Action Figure, from the Motion Picture, "Toy Story". I love him to Deaf and have him standing near by my "Buzz Lightyear", Action Figure. My Cowboy Smurf, still lives with me. Right there with the faux wooden box my sister Ana Beth gifted me. A neat little private box for my little odds-n-ends. Yeah? Sits right there. I place my charging cellular telephone here on my bed-side table too.
There's a photo in colour of my Great Grand Mother Mimi, my Dearest Abuela, my Grand Mother with the Gathering of Many Grand Children. The photograph, sitting right there next to my picture cards of Jesus, the one's with the prayers printed on reverse of art work. My Heart.
Other than one call from one sister who lives in Georgia, a week or two removed and my Dearest Honorable Daughter, who lives near Africa, calling me to ask if I had heard that my Abuela had had a heart attack. Well, hell no, I had not received a call informing such from no one. None
Again..
I am ashamed and embarrassed by the conduct of Elders who I think are operating on many different levels of not knowing the reason's why they say and do as they live. Yes, roll with it. It is confusing, yes. But in this case, I see perfectly well without my new prescription glasses. Same thing is to see I still have certain Elders who speak like this and do like that. Almost as silly adolescents and perpetuate ill and sad energies.
Not a single elder called to have a talk with me or my bride. This is so true that it cuts to my lungs meat...
Your silence and my Deafness is a clear indication of this and thus, I have been journaled...
A. Some assume. Honey, I know this. I do.
B. Some Kin like playing emotional blabber mouth game.
C. See which One or the other win's the greatest ape chest bump. Alpha Man? Alpha Woman?
D. You never did call me to share any passing's of my Kinfolk. No. No one did.
E. What makes this so sad is that this is a snap shot of my life. Snap and just like that.
F. Let me put this like this then, I am at the point where I have done gone on and begin what had to happen. Direct myself, engage myself and protect I and I from the environments of some.
G. A beginning of the beginning to feel the separation and grow with it.
H. In the past it would have been my nature to hurry up and call and talk and listen and I'm here stuck in my house. But, I am different now. NO MORE FAKE GOD-FATHER/MOTHER!
I. Wouldn't it be so nice to gather with Kinfolk, drink cafe con leche and have that opportunity to visit my Ninety-Four Year Old Abuela Mary. I would absolutely love this! But, the energy?
J. And like really, there is in fact a few of some who have this "all wrong"!
K. It's In The Blood.
L. I am okay with this shit for now. Really.
Your silence and my Deafness is a clear indication of this and now have been sent out via communique.
Life is so short...
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