At this very moment, I want to sleep. I want to lie in bed and not think. I want to not be blue and rest my mind and both halves's of mine brain. I do not believe these symptoms I had since I awoke - have anything to do with my last Meniere's attack. Even though I wonder about this. Meniere's does as Meiner's wishes.
My heart is sad and heavy today, which probably doesn't help the Meniere's situation and symptoms as they are today....
My dearest sister Theresa, is moving away. This is a tough scene on My Path. She has been an advocate for me and ensured we would get together every once in a while. Have some cafe con leche and Cuban bread toasted with a bit of butter and Swiss cheese. She is one of my dear shopping Buddy's, you know? She brings me surprises just to make me happy and would listen to me while I cried on the other end of the telephone. By the way, Theresa was the fourth born in my family of seven siblings. Um, she would beat me at marbles at a very young age. We have so damned much in common! I am proud of her, I love her to Deaf, and yes, I am and feel happy she has found a different piece of Mother Earth on which to dwell. This Is just a Sista Thang. Not too many understand this. Damn it Face, I am going to miss you something awful!
My nausea has been a mid-high. An overage in the nausea department that has provided an opportunity to taste my medications twice today. I have the taste of water in my mouth right now. Have not broke fast yet. Am not really hungry right now. I have drank six plus pints of water since awakening. This assists me in the idea that burping aids in the sensation's of nausea. Yes.
The Worms have been very active today and felt the wiggles just moments ago. With this bunch of worms being just West side of my ear and between my skull and flesh. Squiggly, squirming bastards! I mean, I am taking the neurological medication exactly as prescribed by She-Who-No-Longer-Intimidates-Me. Yes, there are many times when I do not feel the sensations for hours or a spell at a time. Yes, yes I know. I thank the Great One, for keeping these worms from wiggling twenty four hours a day. I would be inclined to slice the back of my head to see what really is going on back there. Well, it is true. It appears none of my doctors seem to be that interested in them. Other than pop-a-pill.
The whole hearing piece has gone or is simply going awarer. Too poor, this loss of hearing. Problematic no longer fits this category. Communicating in general, whether it be via telephone or in same room. There is "no" more hollering across the house. Shit, that has been for a chunk of time right there. Listening to what my ear wants me to hear. On occasion have the moments of silence. Still. Hearing has just gone that way, which leaves me no place but to go with it.
It is true that One does not know how fortunate One is to hear and listen to music or watch News Reports and not need an interpreter to assist One with understanding what is sometimes said. Or misunderstood. Until One has the misfortune of losing One's Hearing.
The sounds have been torture. Sounds that can get so loud that my very attention is distracted and or attracted to what it is my ears age giving me to listen to. Voices, clear as day have returned. No, I'm not afraid of these anymore. Wait, I have been startled by them yes. Clever shits will catch me totally off guard that provokes a startle and the reactions to such startles. Ha! I mean really. What the fuck can I say? It is as if hyper-vigilance is omni-present. Simple sounds.
My balance and coordination is an "8".
Have been perspiring and sweating on and off today. Well, really since last evening. Don't feel properly hygiene right now. I feel dirty. Unkempt.
Close to being unhinged - at this moment.
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