I may be sad and depressed. That's late news, I'm already knowing this and am working on it with gusto! Somethings I know, are I don't need to be ridiculed or mocked with YOUR ignorance's or opioion's based on YOUR non-qualified approach to dealing with these issues.
I may be sick and I may be ill, and yes, I am having to deal with some really ridiculous and life altering shit, what with the disease meniere's, with the dizziness, puking, vertigo attacks, sweating, pill-after-pill-after-pill, the foiken falls...I can't drive, can't ride a trike, can't go out-side UNSUPERVISED, can't go in the pool UNSPERVISED!! But, somethings I know are...
...I'm not stupied. Niether is He-Who-Touched-My-Brain and his staff, Sir Dude, my therapist, Dr. Psych aka He-Who's-Learning-My Mind and his staff and neither is She-Who-Is-My-Doctor and her staff.
What YOU need to do, is familiarize YOURSELF with what it is that is going on in my mind, body and Spirit's. YOU need to read up on what it is my MIND, BODY, and SPIRIT's are REALLY going through before YOU pass YOUR ill informed attitudes and proclaim YOUR ignorances as a reality...
YOUR ignorance may be YOUR bliss, but let me deal with this disease and these disorders with MY family and MY well trained and caring professionals who DO what it is THEY must DO to make ME better. My skull and everything it contains are well taken care of.
Some things I know...
...and NO, I WILL NEVER GIVE UP!! I may be going through some rather ugly SHIT right now, but PLEASE, work with ME - not against ME. These are MY hope and dreams.
Something I do know, is that I walk with my face forward...walking in Grace and holding tightly to every prayer and hope I have...One step at a time, I walk my Path.
Mario, friend and brother. I feel that at some level I have accompanied you on this path of yours. I recognize that I have not been in the thick of it as your dear family has been, but you and I keep in touch the best we can...separated by the pond and our own separate lives.
ReplyDeleteYou have shared much with me about your challenges, your triumphs, curveballs, sadness, and anger. I remember the phone conversations that occurred between you and I as this disease began to slowly alter your life as you know it. And I cherish the few times we have been able to connect at your crib when you were feeling up to receiving company.
I feel blessed to be able to read your blog - this extension of yourself to the world and to share in this other level of your experience that sometimes you have held back or perhaps you chose to set it aside for the times we were together. This forum is more detailed and stream of consciousness and for me it provides some shapshots of how you are feeling and what you are experiencing on any given day that you choose to put yourself out there.
This 'ignorance' that you speak of is truly the disease that the world is afflicted with and it saddens me that other human beings can be so insensitive or unaware that their behavior can create such a negative impact on those around them. We are evolving as a species but my wish is that the emotional and spiritual evolution was on par with the technological evolution of things that are making our lives 'better.'
You are a powerful, beautiful man and never forget that no matter what state your body is in that is so.
I hope to see you in person sooner than later.
Peace and blessings my dear friend,
Jonathan
Windhorse sounds very wise. I agree with him.
ReplyDeleteYou ROCK Mario
My Sister, Windhorse is a wise one. As I too consider you wise, Medicine Woman. Thank you for your note and thanks for being a part of my Life. I am blessed beyond expression for having both of you in my Circle, my Relations and kindred, Like Minded...Oh my dear, what a gift from Great Spirit!
ReplyDeletepeace and love, always,
Mario