Dear Right Good Readers,
Since my last entry much as gone on and much has been happening with my ensuring that appointments are made and kept in a timely manner, that I receive medications as ordered by my doctors, and that my entire team remains 'on same page'. Any variation of this chaffs my buttocks and does irritate me well enough. These that have issue does usually require a patient and doctor face to face. No matter which doctor or anything or anyone, it doesn't matter to me. Gladly, I am able to report that for the most part, all teams within any of the practices and or clinics I am involved with, treat me with the utmost of respect and care. I know I am blessed, and with the rights of a patient I am secure. I realize that I have top notch professors and doctors working with me as a team on this body of mine. All have been open to side bar conversations and all have obliged me with an adjustment in whatever it may have been.
In the past four to five weeks I have had two Meniere's attacks that rocked my real world really disgusting! The always present nausea, though these two times were non-productive. I have bad hours long problems with the sweats, severe enough to require two showers per day. I have lost several hours of life to the Sleep Gloom, but was blessed with 72 hour recovery times on both most recent. Sir, so too many times I have slept for +60 hours in less than one week. I might only pray for briefer times subdued by this particular fucked up symptom of Meniere's Disease. Yes, simply too much time away from my world, and enough of a problem to gain a diagnosis of Hyper-Somnia. There have been horrifying falls, clearly walking into a clear as a day door arch. Fumbles and stumbles, and walking about as if I were truly intoxicated. When I get to feeling like this, or when I exit my Little Blue Van or Bus, I walk backwards step-by-step. For now I prefer to manage my walk backwards. My innards gets a bit off balance, maybe confused even when exiting a large Bus.
Please my Guests, let me start on my left Deaf Ear. I do usually have my BAHA (Bone Anchored Hearing Aid, attached to the implant - but, you see, my implant popped out one week ago Saturday. The best I can describe is that that long ago I was having some harsh pain coming from my implant and the surrounding area, He-Who-Touched-My-Brain, actually predicted that the entire implant would fall out of my thick skull and scalp. My most awesome doctor began the ordering of all necessary tools, equipment, and the most current BAHA available! The BAHA 5, and the anticipation from within creates this sensation of me needing to go void some liquids. I just don't have to and I let play over the tapes of my implant popping out like a loose tooth, then fall onto my left shoulder and freaked me out for a moment. No blood and no more pain, but I bet you I called my right good doctor. While we were discussing plans then, he offered up the titanium souvenir as a gift. Yes, we laughed. Oh, My Lord, and my doctor with hands blessed by God, I trust this person as a doctor, man-to-man, and as a fellow Christian. Have carried on the chit-chat and didn't mention that today I was able to also see my Dr. Mel B., who is such an awesome cool Radiologist, and she is a Shero of mine. (I picked up New Mommy vibes from Dr. Mel B., I don't think she knows this yet and if she has, she's not mentioned it to staff. Hmmm, be healthy dearest doctor. The operation for the latest implant is scheduled for later this month. No, my doctor does not play. Between now and then, there will be pre-op's, tests, x-rays and that sort of thing. I am ready, perhaps not so much for pain, but rather for my implant. I miss my older BAHA. I mean for Pete's sake, I've had the ole fellow for a hand full of years and I've grown rather attached to my hearing assisted devices, my BAHA for my left ear and a hearing aid for my right ear. You see, my dear Reader's, there are days when things get really so shitty, especially without my BAHA and my right ear has a bad day...
... Kindred One's, it gets very quiet in here. Should have mentioned it before. No wait, I have spoken about the deepness of the loneliness that builds from within my heart. There are times tears escape from the corners of my eyes, like a natural of water.
Neurologically speaking, just as ground was being made with chronic pain, we may have to restart the entire processes that were started well over one year ago. Yes, I say light, but now, with the actual surgery immediately around the corner, the ways with my face - getting all droopy, the spiders and worms, the bleeding sounds within a Deaf Ear, the actual bleeding and wound maintenance. And then with what I consider worst of all the muscle spasms that I frequently have on my left face. We had damned near had it beaten on my right side. To begin anew?
Look, if I could have walked into that Tampa General Hospital/University of South Florida and jumped on a gurney to get it done, I would have got it done. Just like that too!
Will keep in touch. Peace.
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